My first middle school locker combination was 10-20-30. And my locker was #740. True story.
I can remember this as plain as if it was yesterday. I can’t actually remember yesterday, mind you, but this middle school locker thing, crystal clear.
Why the locker gods gifted me with this ridiculously easy combo I’ll never know. Maybe they had the power of omniscience and knew in advance just how brutal that particular year was going to be for me, peering into the future and seeing the wicked acne, the ridiculous hair and the outright bullying and thinking “let’s give this one a pass on the locker drama.”
But here’s the thing about middle school, friends, I am going to bet that we can all remember our locker combinations. We can remember almost all of middle school better than we can remember college (sure, maybe there are a few different reasons for this, but still). We can remember it better than last week. We can remember it like it was, well, yesterday. No matter how long ago it really was.
Those years, friends, what is it about them that emblazons them on our memories, searing even the worst and most awkward moments into our brains never to be erased or glossed over? Why are they so important in shaping who we are and what we think of ourselves?
I really don’t know.
If I’m being open and honest about my middle school self, which I obviously have no problem being, I was, in a word, brutal. I was awkward looking (read about that here). I did awkward things (read that here) and I was just a walking talking hot mess of a middle school awkwardness.
It’s not that I had an overall terrible middle school experience. I didn’t. There were some highs amidst the lows and I did manage to come through relatively unscathed, with my winning personality and hard fought sense of sarcasm and wit. But if you asked me to name a time period I wouldn’t go back to for a million dollars, you can bet I would say 1991-1993.
And not just because of the music.
Which is why it’s almost hilarious that I am now being tasked with parenting a middle schooler. Yes, I am now entering into a new phase of this parent life, making the leap from the relatively uncomplicated elementary school days, for which I am forever grateful, and now being forced into, by the laws of nature and mankind, this period of parenting that seems wrought with stress, anxiety and pitfalls at every turn.
Wasn’t it just yesterday that we finally got out of diapers? Didn’t we ditch bottles just a hot minute ago? It all goes so fast. Each stage seems hard and insurmountable, yet somehow we do it. I thought the terrible twos would last forever. But they didn’t. I felt like we would never be able to stop policing the stairs for fear of mortal danger. But we were. Potty training seemed like an unending battle. But we’re here. We made it and we’re all wearing big kid underpants (finally).
There are a lot of books that tell you how to raise your kids. Authors and psychologist and street level busy bodies are really good at telling us what we should and shouldn’t do to produce well adjusted kids. This doesn’t stop with breast versus bottle or working versus stay at home. It keeps going. There’s enough out there to make you question your every move. But we keep going.
And one day you find yourself walking down that locker filled hall and buying ugly PE uniforms (really PE teachers of America? You couldn’t improve upon those things in 25 years?) wondering how on earth you got here.
That day will have you staring at your child in wonder as he works to master that dreaded combination lock. You’ll watch him navigate the complicated social maneuver of trying to figure out who is in his homeroom class and stress over who he’s going to sit next to at lunch. You’ll try and help him manage the organization and workload and worry about whether or not it’s just all too much for his 11-year old self to handle.
And you’ll feel as unprepared and as unready as you did when you drove home from the hospital on that first day. You won’t be a pro middle school mom yet. You won’t even be close. But you’ll keep trying. You’ll learn alongside that boy as he grows, each stage teaching you new things and toughening up your mom skin just a bit more.
So here I come Middle School. Take two. I hope you’re kinder to me this time around. I hope your good outweighs the bad for my son. And that he somehow escapes the teenage acne gene which is coming in hard and fast from my side of the pool. I hope I can be cool when I need to be and tough when it’s required. I hope I embarrass him just enough to keep his middle school experience legit but remain cool enough that he knows he can come to me about anything. I pray that I can help him walk with Jesus, even when it’s not cool, and help him be an example of kindness and love even in the dark barren landscape known as the middle school hallway.
And I also pray that I have the self-control to NOT get all crazy-mom on the first little middle school girl that breaks his heart.
Lord, this is hard.
Who signed me up for this parenting thing anyway?
Anywho….on to the recipe (because there’s always a recipe, right?)
Roasted Garlic Fettuccine with Pancetta and Parmesan Recipe
In light of the lingering nature of middle school trauma, I decided to share with you a recipe that has, well, the lingering nature of garlic. Which I mean in the best way possible. This is just one of those honest to goodness simple recipes that I think everyone should have in their toolbelt. The star of the show is this garlic pasta I found at our local farmers market. You can get it online here, and while I am in no way affiliated with the company, I do love highlighting products that are just good quality made by small companies that deserve a little light. This stuff is ridiculously good. But, even if you don’t want to buy the pasta and have it shipped I am positive this recipe would be good with plain old fettuccine or linguine too. Anytime you can combine pancetta, parmesan and garlic together you pretty much have a win. This recipe proves that in an easy enough for weeknight/fancy enough for company dinner that makes you crave it long after the last bite is gone.
Which, by the way, I’m craving it now so there’s that.
Peace, love, and parenting,
Meg
Roasted Garlic Fettuccine with Pancetta and Parmesan
Ingredients
- 1 lb Pappardellas Roasted Garlic Fettuccine (or plain fettuccine)
- 4 ounces diced pancetta
- 2 cloves garlic, minced (optional if you don't like garlic like I do)
- Pinch of Crushed Red Pepper Flakes
- 1/2 cup shredded parmesan cheese, plus more for serving
Directions
- Step 1 Heat a large pot of water on medium high and cook pasta according to package directions, saving a mug of the pasta water before draining.
- Step 2 Set aside.
- Step 3 In a large skillet heat a drizzle of olive oil to shimmering over medium high heat. Add pancetta and cook until nearly crisp, stirring often.
- Step 4 Add garlic and red pepper (if using) cook, stirring constantly for about 30 seconds or until fragrant.
- Step 5 Add pasta, parmesan and half of your reserved pasta water, stirring constantly to incorporate.
- Step 6 If pasta seems dry, add more water little by little until it is coated and to your liking.
- Step 7 Serve immediately with parmesan to top, making sure to get lots of the crispy pancetta in each bowl.
- Step 8 ENJOY!
Welcome to BurntToast! My name is Meaghan, and this is my safe space, a place where we can share stories, share recipes and share life. It’s my dream that you can come here, kick your shoes off and pour yourself a glass of wine while you read, laugh, and maybe even hop into the kitchen. This is my heart, for all of you to see. And ALL are welcome here.