Y’all, I sent my boys to school on Tuesday covered in scratches, bruises and at least one unfortunately placed set of bite marks. I sent them with that dread only a parent can know, the dread of feeling like every phone call is from the school counselor, demanding a meeting with CPS. But, like most parents, I had absolutely nothing to do with any of these injuries. Not a thing. But I still think I’m to blame. Do you want to know why?
Because I let that curse of a game called “Fortnite” into my household.
In my defense, I was so naive I had no idea what I was getting us into. None.
If you know us personally, you might be just a little bit surprised that we have fallen into this gigantic hole of humanity that Fortnite has caused. We are a dark ages family. We revel in our anti-technology stance, not just for our children, but ourselves as well. I mean, I just got an iPhone 7 after my 5 just couldn’t anymore, and I was mad about it. We are not advanced over here.
But even more than for ourselves, we hold very strong beliefs about children and technology. Call us Amish, make jokes about our kids doing math on Abacuses (is that even how you say that or is the plural Abacusi? We need to know these things). We do not care. Our oldest is one of the last hold outs in fifth grade without a phone, none of us have iPads, and we aren’t generally video game people, despite having an Xbox.
So when our children started to beg us to add this game, this innocent little hide and seek game called Fortnite, to the Xbox, our instant reaction was “oh heck no. You’ll stick with FIFA and like it.”
And then the whining, bargaining and begging began, breaking us down one negotiation at a time.
The good news is that our yard will be forever clean of dog poop.
The bad news is that Fortnite is here.
Clearly after watching this game for 10 minutes we realized that, unlike how it was sold, this is no typical “hide and seek” game. Unless, of course, in your games of hide and seek you kill ’em when you find ’em. Because then it’s exactly like it.
It is, however, the most mesmerizing and child captivating thing since Pokemon Go. It is, in my opinion, a personality changer for kids not yet mature enough to handle mortal combat. And it is very, very annoying.
On my part this isn’t a moral debate about guns or video games or age limits or restrictions. Though I’m sure there are some of those underlying themes lurking around in here somewhere. It’s really just about annoyance.
Yup, it really is about me this time.
I just can’t with this game. I don’t understand why it has taken a vice grip on the attention and adoration of my sons and all of their friends and friends of their friends. I don’t understand how it can alter their minds so much that they would literally do anything to get “just five more minutes”. I don’t understand how shouting “Hide, hide!” to your friends through a video game is considered “fun.”
OH MY GOSH I SOUND JUST LIKE MY MOTHER.
Anywho….
In the two weeks since this game has been in our lives we have had multiple fist fights, one all out brawl (thus the scratches, bruises and inexplicable bite mark), one wall kicked, one instance of an unapproved “game pack” purchasing (whatever that means), and multiple instances of tears, whining and complaining.
They complain mainly because of us. Yes, the only reason we keep it around and its sole redeeming quality: it’s a parenting game changer–the ultimate bargaining chip.
Want your kids to do homework without complaining?
Fortnite.
You want them to mow the lawn?
Fortnite.
Clean the bathroom?
Fortnite.
Solve world hunger?
You know where I’m going here….
So there is that going for it. It’s leverage.
My pre-kid self is judging the heck out of me right now. And that’s ok.
Here’s the deal, parents, I’m still not sure if this game is going to stay. I really am not comfortable with the idea of it. I’m not fully comfortable with the way it can infiltrate our house and our kids minds and take over. But I do know that it provides me with some leverage that I don’t usually have. Instead of begging and cajoling my oldest to read, we laid out a strict “minute for minute” policy that has him devouring books so he can get his minutes in. It has helped bridge social gaps that his somewhat immature self can’t manage to do otherwise, and as long as we monitor daily who is on his “friends” list, I’m semi-comfortable with that aspect of it.
But I love that my children, no matter how attached to this game they are, still love to be outside playing basketball or jumping on the trampoline. They’re still kids and that pull towards “doing something” has not yet been totally taken over by a video game, and my hubs and I work daily to make sure that this remains.
In fact, a few of my sons friends refer to our house as the “play 60” house because they know they’re gonna have to put in the work to get what they want.
And that makes me smile. Mostly because they don’t seem to mind one bit. 
We live in a changing world; the challenges we face as parents are miles apart from what our parents faced. I mean, remember pagers? At the time, our parents feared they were the gateway to the drug underworld as we begged and begged and begged for them (my see-through pink pager was the BOMB, y’all. And never once did I facilitate a drug deal with it). Now we have to deal with tough decisions about phones, social media, video games, apps….the list goes on and on and on. And truth be told, none of us have the perfect answer. We’re all feeling our way through this mess together.
Man, I’m so thankful for grace in times like this. Heaven knows we’re messing up left and right and we’ve started saving for therapy in kind. But at least we’re trying. We’re working and changing and adapting as new parenting issues, problems and video games fly in our way. We won’t always get it right, but at least we are trying in love. And there’s grace for the rest.
Always thankful for grace.
So, parents, I really need to know your thoughts on this game. Is there something I’m missing that makes it dreadful and a must remove? Is it ok as long as lines are drawn in the sand? We’re so new to this technology thing I’m desperate for thoughts and guidance from those that have “been there, done that.”
Speak up, let me know. I really am curious.
And as a side note, I’m sharing a recipe today that, unlike my parenting when it comes to video games, is a complete win with my children. They LOVE these little things. I’m not sure if it’s because they are pies that they can hold in their hands or if it’s because they actually taste so good, but they love them. Even my pickiest eater has declared them “awesome,” so into our weekly rotation they will go. The great thing about these is that they can be played with–don’t want ranch, sub in barbeque sauce and they should be just as tasty, add bacon, broccoli, anything you would like, this recipe can handle it. I’m working on a chick pea curry version too (though I can’t guarantee anyones kids will declare that verion “awesome”) and will post it as soon as I get it made. They also can be prepared ahead of time (think Sunday night) using rotisserie chicken and baked on a busy weeknight when time is short. Add a veggie and you’re golden.
Even if your kids hate you for taking away a video game, at least they’ll love dinner.
Peace, love and parenting,
Meg
Ranch Chicken and Cheese Hand Pies
Ingredients
- 2 pre-made pie crusts cut into 5' rounds (use a small bowl as an outline)
- 2 cups chopped rotisserie chicken
- 1/2 cup finely diced onion
- 3/4 cup shredded cheddar
- 1/2 cup ranch dressing
- Salt and Pepper to taste
- 1 egg
Directions
- Step 1 Preheat oven to 375 and line a baking sheet with parchment paper
- Step 2 In a large bowl combine chicken, onion, cheese, ranch and salt and pepper to taste. Mix well.
- Step 3 Lay one pie crust round out on baking sheet and spoon about 2 tablespoons in the center.
- Step 4 Fold into a half-moon shape and crimp edges closed with a fork.
- Step 5 With a sharp knife, cut a tiny slit in the top, just enough to let steam release as it’s cooking.
- Step 6 Repeat with remaining pies.
- Step 7 In a small bowl, combine egg with one tablespoon water, beating for a second or two to combine.
- Step 8 Using a pastry brush, gently brush each pie with the egg wash to ensure a nice color.
- Step 9 Bake for 25-25 minutes or until pies are golden and crust is flaky.
- Step 10 Let sit for five minutes to cool before eating, the stuffing will be HOT!
Welcome to BurntToast! My name is Meaghan, and this is my safe space, a place where we can share stories, share recipes and share life. It’s my dream that you can come here, kick your shoes off and pour yourself a glass of wine while you read, laugh, and maybe even hop into the kitchen. This is my heart, for all of you to see. And ALL are welcome here.