If you’ve been following me for any amount of time, you should (hopefully) know by now that I am painfully aware of my own faults. Instead of hiding them or working to overcome then like any normal person does, I choose to wave them around like a broken and tattered flag. Mainly because I think they’re the funniest and most entertainingly human parts of me but also because I feel like the more I share my vulnerabilities, the things that I know aren’t my strong points, the less vicious they become to my sense of self. Kind of like the best offense is a good defense. Or vice versa. I can’t ever remember which is which.
Probably because SPORTS is also not one of my strong suits.
Another one of my well-documented “weaknesses” is my almost laughable aversion to all things crafty. I touched on this a few months ago when I went on a rant against the Valentines Day box (read that here). But in case you think I was just trying to be funny, let me assure you I was not. I don’t like to DIY, well, anything.
So why I decided to take it upon myself to chalk paint our bedroom furniture, we’ll never really know. It seemed like a good idea at the time. And in retrospect it really kind of was, because it does look good and fresh and super “farmhouse-y” without costing the bundle of doing a full furniture replacement. But the actual act of painting, regardless of the outcome, is so outside of my comfort zone it’s actually quite funny.
The part that’s really funny, though, is the completely uncharacteristic type A person that comes out when a paintbrush is in my hand. I become a brushstroke lunatic, carefully monitoring that we go with the grain, ALWAYS with the grain. I touch up, repaint and obsessively correct because I want each piece to look perfect. It is quite exhausting if I’m being honest. I don’t know how you Type A people do it.
But my Type-A perfect painter self ran into quite a pickle when I started work on my nightstand last weekend. Because scrawled out in the tiny imperfect handwriting of 4 year old Kenzie was a note to me, graffitied in gold marker on the bottom shelf. It’s been there for quite a few years, and despite the fact that I probably should have disciplined my dear daughter at the time for destruction of property, the message was just too sweet and I never did. Because written in her tiny little baby girl handwriting it said “HI Mommy, I love you so much!” with about 80 exclamation points and twenty hearts.
I’m not kidding. 
Friends. I tried. I really did. But I couldn’t paint over it. All of my perfectionist tendencies flew right out the window in the face of this graffiti. While I know it’s not cool to write on furniture (thank goodness she’s well past that stage)I think that sentiment, that love, yeah, it shouldn’t be covered up.
The love behind that kind of act, it’s that teeth gritting, tensed up love that prompts moms to say that they want to eat their babies. It’s all encompassing. It’s that feeling you get when you’re faced with the cutest baby with the chunkiest legs on the planet or a puppy that is just so fluffy and puffy and cute that you cannot contain yourself–you actually want to bite them.
I am positive you’ve experienced it.
That love prompts weird things. It prompts graffiti. It prompts wild acts of kindness. It prompts selflessness. It prompts kindness. It prompts the good stuff. Yet somehow, as grown adults, we manage to tamp that down and be socially appropriate more than love appropriate.
We have somehow managed to get teeth-gritting angry over politics. We get shoulder-tensing indignant over things that offend us. We’ve managed to make everyone and everything so polarized and divided and over-the-top “me versus them” that we’ve lost sight of the feeling of teeth-crunching love.
What if we put the same teeth gritting energy into loving others? Even people we disagree with. Even the ones that drive us insane. What if we chose to drop the righteous indignation and polarization and found that graffiti inspiring love somewhere deep down inside of us?
I mean, Jesus never mentions wanting to eat babies with delicious chunky baby legs or take a bite out of puppies, but He sure as heck showed that kind of love. Even to the tax collectors. To the prostitutes. To the unsuccessful fishermen. To the adulterers. In fact, His harsh words, yea, those were for the ones with the teeth clenching judgement and hypocrisy.
And listen, this isn’t meant to be preachy because it certainly isn’t something I do well. Maybe I’m speaking more to myself than to anyone else. I find that I turn to teeth clenching frustration more than I ever care to admit (I mean, I’m a mom who has taken her kids into public so I have definitely perfected that teeth clenched whisper yell that is more drop dead terrifying than an actual scream). But I don’t like it much. And afterwards, when I walk away after a moment of body-tensing anger or frustration, I kind of hate myself for a minute.
But when I walk away from some love grafitti left on my nightstand by my daughter who knows how to love with her whole heart and soul? I feel joyful. And at peace. And happy.
And maybe we all need a dose of that kind of happy and peace on the reg so we can stop being so darn angry all the time.
And maybe, just maybe, if we all loved each other as much as we collectively love pumpkin, world peace could be achieved.
OK, maybe not. But that doesn’t change the fact that pumpkin is amazing and I can’t stop using it in recipes and sharing them with you because, well, they’re delicious. Especially this one. An idea inspired by the same friend who pushed me to make those to-die-for Pop Tarts (recipe here). She handed me a bag of Gingersnaps and said “I don’t like these. What can you do with them?” With that, we were off to the races and these delicious little Mini Pumpkin Cheesecakes were born.
The pumpkin filling, it’s just everything you want in a pumpkin dessert. Less cheesecake-y than pumpkin pie-like, it is smooth and delicate and wonderfully pumpkin without too much sweet. But the winner here, it’s the GingerSnap crust. Subbing out traditional graham crackers with these spicy little treats takes them to the next level. The crust, it’s the star of the show. These little treats, they deserve all the love. They will break the internet. They are your new holiday dessert.
Just in case you were wondering how the nightstand story ends: I didn’t paint over the love graffiti. I couldn’t make myself do it. So today I proudly have a less than perfectly painted nightstand that makes me smile every single time I see it.
Love kind of does that.
Peace, love and, well, love,
Meg
Mini Pumpkin Cheesecakes with Ginger Snap Crust
Ingredients
- For the crust:
- 1 cup gingersnap crumbs (pulse about 25 gingersnaps in a blender until crumb consistency)
- 2 tablespoons brown sugar
- 3 tablespoons melted butter
- For the filling:
- 1 8 ounce package of cream cheese at room temperature
- 1 cup pumpkin puree
- 1/2 cup brown sugar
- 1 teaspoon vanilla
- pinch of salt
- 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
- 3 eggs
Directions
- Step 1 Preheat oven to 325 and line a 12 tin muffin pan with paper liners.
- Step 2 In a small bowl combine gingersnap crumbs, melted butter and brown sugar. Stir until combined.
- Step 3 Press 1 heaping tablespoon of crumbs into each muffin tin and cook for five minutes. Set aside.
- Step 4 In the bowl of a stand mixer add cream cheese, pumpkin, brown sugar, cinnamon, vanilla and salt.
- Step 5 Beat on high until completely combined and smooth (about 2-3 minutes).
- Step 6 Add in one egg at a time, beating on low for just a few seconds after each egg.
- Step 7 Once completely combined, spoon on top of crust until each tin is filled about 3/4 full.
- Step 8 Bake for 25-30 minutes or until center is almost set.
- Step 9 Turn off the oven but don’t open the door, let cool for about an hour.
- Step 10 Transfer to fridge, loosely covering with plastic wrap for about two hours until completely set.
- Step 11 Serve with whipped cream.
Welcome to BurntToast! My name is Meaghan, and this is my safe space, a place where we can share stories, share recipes and share life. It’s my dream that you can come here, kick your shoes off and pour yourself a glass of wine while you read, laugh, and maybe even hop into the kitchen. This is my heart, for all of you to see. And ALL are welcome here.
These look fabulous! Thank you
They are so yummy! Thank you!